i spent the whole of tuesday tucked in bed battling fever induced chills, the need to regurgitate every morsel of food i attempted to consume, and abdominal pain so bad that it felt as if someone with really huge sandpaper hands decided to twist my internal organs as one would do when squeezing dry a really wet cloth. and when my skin became unbearable to touch and smelt of hot tar, and when food (which everyone knows i love so much) activated my gag-reflex, i wished, as i drifted in-and-out of consciousness, i could just die because perhaps then i wouldn't be in this much pain.

but then i wake up, untangle myself from the foetal position i was stuck in all night, and find it's wednesday morning. my fever's somewhat gone, the hotdog i ate remains unflushed down the toilet, and there is all but a ghost of yesterday's abdominal pain; and now, i'm thankful God decided not to listen to my whiny begging and kept me alive.

boy, i better not contract some untreatable painful disease or get diagnosed with cancer because those things require someone with enough will-power to want to live, to fight against the pain. i am just too darn lazy to fight against pain, i much rather just have it end; but once the pain is over i'll probably be so darn happy that i didn't die - despite begging for death a second ago. so in conclusion, just drug me up and i probably won't go around wishing for death, because without the pain comes the will to live. silly really.

----------------------------------------

because peiyun tagged me, i shall be nice and list out 7 random/weird facts about me.

1) i cannot sleep without a pillow to hug.

2) i cry to Grey's Anatomy.

3) i'm claustrophobic.

4) i once suffered from an eating disorder.

5) i don't like nuts in anything. nuts are meant to be eaten on its own and not stuffed into chocolates or brownies.

6) i abhor fruit cake. whoever gives me or my family another fruit cake for christmas will be shot.

7) i will eventually download britney's new album.

everyone else has been tagged, so i shall not pass the tag forward. i don't spam. heh

----------------------------------------

i just read the novel choices for my classics term paper and i am so happy. i've already read jude the obscure and crime and punishment. yay, less work for me. now which should i choose...

oh and happy halloween you fools.