i am just not wired to handle one-night stands. ok nothing really happened but i seriously do think that i will be incapable to handle a one-night stand. i tend to invest too much of myself into a single person that it becomes too hard for me to turn the other way and pretend nothing happened. i'm not talking about sex or whatever (because frankly i will never have sex out of drunkenness). i just think it's wrong for someone to reel you in and, just when you start giving a part of yourself, smack your 'effin head on the ground, roll you over with a huge-ass bulldozer before laughing his damn face off.

gah. a certain boy is depressing me while the other boy is a fucking liar.

i give up. i don't think i want anyone right now.

i should stop my stupid attraction to boys who are obviously bad for me.