so 2008 saw me growing up a lot faster than i ever intended to, all thanks to the incredible amount of drama i had to go through - losing my dad, morphing into the middlemen for my parents, watching dazzle leave the philippines, ending friendships with certain people who are not good for me, breaking the hearts of innocent boys - and sometimes i finally do feel my age. i've spent enough years deluding myself into thinking that i will always be the happy-go-lucky-no-responsibility-drunk-every-night-without-any-consequences-screw-this-fucking-world seventeen year-old and it is finally time to accept that i am a twenty-two year-old soon-to-be-college-graudate-who-fears-entering-the-workforce and should thus lose the frightening pseudo goth chick^click facade.

i love growing up.

but i guess despite most of the year being a terrible mess, at least it ended on a good note; and really, that is all that matters. i never remember the bad times anyway (or at least i try not to). so when i look back on 2008, all i will remember are the psychotic gig-nights dancing with migo, calling dazzle long-distance just to tell her how much we miss her, random date-nights at bonifacio high street, watching my mom get drunk on wine on christmas eve, enjoying the yummy traditional christmas turkey mom cooks every year, playing UNO with my brother and sister while we gorge on christmasy desserts, watching orchard hop around in the rain as we take him on walks to visit the koi pond in my village, overdosing on yummy designer chocolate, impulsive starbucks run with dazzle at 12midnight, inhaling alcohol while engaging in raunchy sex talks at migo's house, jumping around at the prospect of spending an entire day with girls at Enchanted Kingdom, semi-burning my thumb lighting my sister's sparkler thingies for the new year, and entertaining the idea of starting the new year with a boy in tow.

you see, ever since i moved to the philippines, i have yet to end a year as happy and contented as i am now. last year, which saw me holed up in my room as the fireworks exploded like crazy around the village, was just depressing (this needs no explanation); and the year before that was equally depressing as i recuperated from a bad break up; so i cannot be any happier that things have started looking up for me as i was able to end 2008 and start 2009 with the people i love to death.

on a negative note, however, all this wonderful holiday joy has caused me to gain a gazillion-million pounds from all that holiday feasting and now i'm feeling far from sexy. gah. i hate feeling like a tub of useless lard. i guess january will be spent exercising my fats off. booo.

why must i get fat?

oh and dazzle leaves on tuesday and i wish we girls would never part and remain in a drunken embrace^click forever. before i get all depressed as i watch her leave again, i will post a gif of my wine-loving brother to cheer myself up - i'm way too easily amused.